cAughT oN camEra

tHere was This onE Time..,
i waS randomLy browsIng a haRd disK whiCh belOngs to an aRsehole fRiend Of minE to coPy soME musiC fiLe..
InsteaD i Found somEthiNg elsE..
nOo..,iT's noT poRn.. HUaah..
hE acTuallY kEpt a CollEctIon of oUr frienDs phOto caUght In tHe moSt ugLiest, awkwaRd exPressIon..
hE eveN haS a namE for his collEction, 'Suicide Bomber'
Chee bYe riTe..!! HAha..
cUrious tO kNow Why hE caLls It 'Suicide Bomber'....??
taKe a LooK aT the pIcs belOw...ahHAH.. eNjoY!!

mY baLi pIcs

mY baLi trIp was a BlasT!!!
LikE serioUsly.., we have been DriNkinG lIke nobody busiNEss, non Stop since tHe daY we gOt therE.. wE weRe dRunk evEn before wE could recover frOm ouR prevIous hanGovers(mUltiple-hanGovers..haAHha..iT's a musT try experiEnce..).. Bought likE 4 boTtles of liquor fRom the aiRport and boTtle(SSS) of juNgle Juice..
Kuta Beach was SpectaculaR in every possible way.., thE sun, thE biG waves, chEap icE coLd beeR venDor, aND the besT is Of couRse.., loTs & loTs of niCe looKing BOOBIESSSS. nYEheh..
hoW i wiSH singapOre was siMilaR... thEn i woUld have haD a new Hobby: bOObs gazing..

kUaLa lUmpuR

EarLier tHis year in JanuaRy, i waS in kUala LumpuR toGethEr wiTh all the easT siDer peElerS froM teaM 'C'. iT waS an oRganised tOur by 'G' diVisiOn. I was hEsitant at fiRst tO make thaT trIp aS i was gOing wiTh a bUnch of pOliceman/wOman. yOu knoW hw They arE usuAllY labelled as 'Boring.' Hell yeaH i waS wroNg. I was In foR aloT of surpriSes. and i have to adMit.., daMn dO they knoW how to let lOose. the besT paRt oF tRip waS defiNitelY the friends i maDE. as usuaL, oVerseas tRip wIll not be coMplete for me wiThouT havIng multiplE hanGoveRs, daiLy club routinE, shop anD oF couRse.., the FOOD!! i'm a fooD lover, whAt can i saY... and i mEt wit an oLd aCcomplIce froM kualA lUmpUr.., AlviEra babY... hUahHah...

hEre arE somE of The phoTos i managE to sAve before mY comp caME crAshIng.eNjoy!!

turNinG 22

iTs 5 mins past midnitE whiCh meanS iM oFficially 22. I've bEen getting 'suA TUA' msGeS from My frienDs .. HahHa.. thX skUnks!! to Think of iT, damN it'S a NightmarE..soOn im gOin to Be 30, Then 40 Then 50 Then 60 Then 70 tHen HopefuLly i diEs aftEr thaT.. HeHeE.. iT's been quiTe a jouRneY... not alwayS a sMooth onEs, buT iM surviVing.. I kiNd of miss mY family back iN sinGapore the moSt. Im seateD alone at an internet cafe in bali thInkiIng oF theM..SerIouslY.. soB!SOb!... haHAhHa..
buT I guEss i'LL just havE to hoLd thosE thouGhts back caUse Im headiNg ofF to skY loUnge sOon foR a Pre MooN paRty .. i juSt couldn'T lEt thoSe negative emOtions cLouds my minD. it'll wIll simplY rUIn mY mooD.. I'm in thE mOod to paRty YO!!!hUahHaha.. Im so gOnnA geT laId toniGht..HUauUaha...(Im joKing skUnks.., Im a VIRGIN..,rememBer...??) anYwaY..,ive gOt to go Now.. wanNa get readY.. HahHaha.. iM all sexiTed... talK to skUnks soOn whEn i get back To singapoRe.. WEeEEEeEee

i Thought of writIng an entrY beforE i force mysElf to woRk..
i camE across This entRy whiCh belOng to a frieNd Of minE..
shE's jusT so randoM and weiRd la...
But i lIke it...

whaT shE wroTe:
been away,on a melancholy road to nowhere. roaming around empty streets,making friends with stray cats. i went on a merry-go-round but i didnt get cotton candy. climbed up twenty storey flats and took pictures of the pouring rain. went to the beach and drown my feet into the sand. watched the sunset and poked a dead blackbird with twigs. walked on a yellow brick road and kept a spider in a bottle. i named him bambi and made him fight with armies of red ants. bambi died and then i said a little prayer.

awEsome riTe..??
Hahha...
i kInd of like the namE baMbi...
i shaLl start caLLin aLl my frieNs baMbi..

calling.......rinG rinG
friends pick up.....
me: heLlo baMbi!!!!
friend:huh..?who sia baMbi..??

me:u la....hUahhahha... ok BYe!!
friend:sioW fella!!! Go n diE!!!

husH husH baD niTE!!

uRghhhh...,it's laTe anD i'm noT abLE to gO baCK to mY lalA lanD anytIme soON...
i FreakIng goT woRk in the moRning....
i'M so hype uP for no apparenT reasoN..
maYbe i'm suFferiNg from insoMnia..
maYbe i'M just noT tired enUF..
tOo baD i'm Not married...,iF i were, maYbe i coUld do my wiFe a liTtle and then off To sleep.. HHeheH...
aAaaHhhh...,a MAid wiLl do.... maybe i sHOuld gEt myselF a maID...maID-turn-pornstaR..HEeZ...u know..,liKe the one in roLe plaY... dOmestIc workEr bY daY.., woNder sexwoMAn by niGHt... aaHh my kInd of a superhero...

sHould i helP myself..?? nahHhhh.. i'm so uninspired to do so...
i'll end uP havIng a cramp on mY hand anD havIng thaT part of my Body all Numb..hEez..
i coUld do soMe workOut BUT I'll be sweatiNg and theN i have to take a bath which i haTe doing when everYone's asLeep...(anD No!!! Not bcauSe i'm afraId)..
i Hope i can thiNk of something sooN...
maYbe i shOuld coMplimenT myself to sleeP...(e.G aku handsOme,akU handsome,akU cuTe, aku handsome..nyehhe... ok laMe.., I kNow..)
whateveR it is..,talk to u sKunks sooN..
wEeeeeee...

tHe peRfect waY to BeaT the brEathaLyzEr Test

hEllooo peOlple...
i BrOught gooD news For aLl...
gEttIng caUGht bY thOse aSshOles (hEhHE..*wiNks)wHile drivIng under the infLuence of alcohol miGht just be a thiNg of the PAst..
i miGht just have the peRfect solUtion to beaT the BreathaLyzeR tESt.. HUAHhHAhA

faCts: iT was prOven to Work by a geNius 18 Year oLd unDies-eaTIng daredevIl...nYehE
will i dO it..??
HahHah...sIOw!!!!
NEVER in my riGht staTe oF mind wiLl i evEr be caUght doiNg suCH a thIng..
tOo gooD to be TRue...??
jusT read the artIcle beloW...

sO dOn't be shOcked tHe next tIme yOu exPerienCe sEeinG oNe of ur frienDs
teaRIng, bItinG, chEwiNg anD swallOwing theIr undiEs...HahA..CB!!
PerfEcT solUtion..??
yOu deCide foR urselF......

mY fascInatIon wiTh pHotosHop..

i alway havE thIS HugE hiDden iNtereSt iN phoTogrApHy..
esPecIally the nUde, expliciT oNes..woHooo..nYHeHe(i'M jokinG hOr!!)
i diD consiDer purSuing it in laSalle buT looKing at the hiGh couRse fEe, i decide nOt too..
i aM no mR-loTs-of gReen-bucks guy.. $$$$$$$
infaCt i was Born wiTh a chEap wooDen spOon in mY mouTh..nYeHHe..
aiTe..,lEts go bacK to the TopiC..,
PhotoshOp foR me iS lIke a vibraTed huMAn dicK In a puDenda..
iT reallY does woNder..

uGly+pHotOshop = bRitney spearS
pUdgineSs+pHotOShop = tYra baNks
gorgeouS lOokiNg + phOtoshOp = Me(nYehHe)..

aLl u neEd is creatIvity..
i am No experT buT i thInk i did a prettY gooD joB wiTh some..
enOugh saiD..,
enjOy a few oF my completed 'masTer piecEs'

My fiRst HIgh FashioN shOot FeaT. gaY top model Yuzni miChelle
foR plaYgaY maG..
fOr models bOoking plS call 1800-yuzNi-wiLl-blOw-You.

mY imaGinary GF whO getS me sexciTed whenEver..,whErevEr..nyHEhHe...